- I accept this point. Now a days marriages going on tender. It is just like an agreement between two families.
REPLIES:
Posted By: Boopathiraja
Hi everybody,
I accept this point. Now a days marriages going on tender. It is just like an agreement between two families. If a lady coming with money when marrying, she treats well. Otherwise she treats badly. She will meet many problems in her husband's house.
Posted By: Keerthi
Hello friends,
A must topic to be discussed I feel. Yes " Marriages have become a good business" to earn lakhs and crores even. Today a guy u studies in US demands at least 10 lakhs and the highest limit can be anything .I feel people prefer to do MS just to make business.
I heard about some people who are not ready even to see the girl, If her parents cannot afford to give MIN amount, though she is good at attitude studies and good looking as well.
I don’t know what Marriage is to do with the money when both the persons have good qualifications to settle well in life. Infact the importance must be given to the people who are going to marry, the decision must be given to them bcoz they are the ones who are going to live together for the rest of the life.
Daily we see a lot of news about the women being harassed and killed just for the sake of dowry. What kind of person he is when he is ready to kill his partner for the sake of money. In my view such persons must be given a death sentence. And government should take severe action on the persons who accept dowry.
We see many politicians daily giving long speeches against this issue, but what happens when it comes to his own daughters or sons marriage, God only knows how much they give or take.
And some parents in the rich families take it as a prestige issue. I think they feel the one whom takes/gives more money is very great. So I feel this system must be eliminated in rich families first.
Posted By: OOPS
I 100% agree with Keerthi.
Beggars are better than the people who take dowry. Parents should change their attitude towards taking dowry.
Even I have seen many girls who suggest their brothers to take dowry.
It is a sick attitude. Lot of males playing with female life just because of dowry. We should punish the people who take dowry.
It’s becoming a dangerous issue in poor class families. It is very sad to know that even few idiots ready to kill their best half just for dowry. If they give birth to a baby girl they are just throwing them in dustbin. Think for a while?
These days 80% males want to study in US or want to work in US just to take more dowries. What a sick attitude? We have to punish these educated idiots. Even I have seen many of friends going to US or UK just to take more dowries. Yes its 100% purely a business now in India in fact it is a growing business.
As a guy my suggestion to other guys:
Marry a girl but not money. Money is sick it just come & go in our life but your wife will stay with you till your final breath. You cannot measure a girl with money. She is more than any amount of money. It’s our responsibility to protect them If not soon you will see a world with out these angles
Start changing the attitude of your parents & sisters towards taking dowry.
** Think of our culture once " INDIA is the only place where a female has a lot respect “ But now wts happening?
Posted By: Dr YVS
Well, I differ. Business has always a buyer, a seller. Who is who here? As long as marriage is an institution and parents believe, they shall get a good bride (groom), they pay a price, Ise. To the extent of dowry one can argue of business. Not the whole process. With the literacy in women increasing, their % at jobs increasing, current day parent are worried on Love marriages and related pains like suicide, killing etc. Marriages are business to Marriage halls, Flower guys, Shamiana guys, caterers etc.
Posted By: Sriya
I do feel marriages have become a business in
Posted By: Keerthi
Yes I too feel marriage process is not business, it is to be respected a lot. But many are making it a business for the sake of dowry.
Why not all of us stop accepting/giving dowry when some people are killing the women for sake of money. Can’t we give up this system for protecting many more lives? I think life is more important than money.
Yes parents want to get good brides, but I think money is not the solution for that. Better understanding about each other’s families is important here. I think there is no need of bringing money matter here.
Posted By: HELP
Yah we agree with you all
What are the better solutions for this problem? Explain point wise if you can...
Posted By: Keerthi
The only better solution is punishment, bcoz this matter is related to money.
I feel we can expect a change in many other matters. But greed for money cannot be wiped out completely.
Posted By: OOPS
Yah it the biggest motive for all these people. These people should know there are many things in our life, which we can't get through money.
Posted By: Mohanraai
Well Guys,
As all said is good. This problem begins with where, we have to note down. When the people went to brides home, first start an arguments (How much dowry) with relatives and parents (especially mothers). So this will start with ladies only. If we start like this, once again it will create arguments in different way. So leave it and think. Now a days parents and people are living for society expectations. We have to live for our self not for neibourhoods.
My suggestions is
1. This problem will rectify only future generation. If u gives some suggestion to others can't get. So if u would like to marry don't get dowry and ur children’s.
2. Give suggestions to ur close relatives others won't get ur suggestion. If they convinced, its ur power.
We can reduce this business also in future, if we take steps.
Posted By: Links571
As with everyone else even I agree that marriage is fast becoming a business in
But there also exists the other kind of people who think marriage is larger than life and believe in each other. People should learn from their examples. This I think is the best way to curb the problem.
Posted By: Keerthi
I think this is a kind of prejudice among the people that only women [mother-in-law] is the cause, well this is due to influence of old movies where the mother-in-law is the only one who is greedy and harasses the daughter-in-law .We cant say only women, but both are the cause .Any one can be greedy about money.
I appreciate the suggestion given by mohanraai, and hope we all succeed in eliminating dowry system in India.
Posted By: Madhuri
I think marriages are becoming business today. Change in attitude of the girl’s parents is must. While getting married to their daughter they should see whether the person is US returned or he can good pay but they should see whether that person is good and family is good and is he money minded?
Before all this even girl's attitude should also change. First she should be independent and she should be given chance while choosing life partner.
Posted By: Sowmya571
Yes I do agree with all your views. But can u all please answer my question. Can we start punishing each n every person.... who does crimes like that? In India where Govt is ruled by RICH PEOPLE who have money n power well considering all these facts. Some things can’t be changed. Rather we can bring awareness amongst ALL GROUPS OF PEOPLE, CHILDREN, and ELDERS AS WELL AS YOUNGSTERS who will get married in future. Well as keerthi and others has said ... People are not even considering whether the female is good, has got good capabilities. Rather than asking so many dowries.... what ever might be...? CHANGE SHUD HAPPEN WITH IN EACH OF US. So that we will be an example for future citizens....
This is what I feel realistically
Posted By: Radkrish
The best way to eliminate dowry is to make it a needless one.
Neglect arranged marriage. Prefer for love marriage (with ur true partner)
Love, love, love.... true love. It will make dowry to be proud of love and can make the dowry a needless one.
Love marriage should rise in India.
Posted By: Shatrughana
I am agreeing above all points. Marriage become business now a days cause today’s some people don’t think about groom how is should be generally every parent think about "PARTY DENEWALA HAI KI NAHI".
Second is some people think about as if some family member dot able to study in Abroad so in that case family member thinks CHALO SHADHI KAR LETE HAI " they don’t think how girls are and what is qualifications are.
So now a days Marriage is agreement between to party.
Posted By: Csekayal
Yes I accept all my friends’ pt
Today some marriages are in-between the spindermotors and the ford cars, not for two heart.
Some person selects their couples according to their degree, to improve their business.
For eg: doctors are joint with doctor, similarly engg, etc.
They are not giving important to their heart.
To avoid this government must take some action against these.
Posted By: Sriya
I disagree with Radhika; love marriage is not the solution to the problem. We have come across many cases where in-laws have troubled their daughters-in law after marriage also. The only solution to this problem lies in the hands of the youth. They should stop taking dowry. The govt should impose punishment on all the dowry takers irrespective of their social status.